Anachronistic fashion-victimhood

Are you a woman (or a man)? Do you wear your hair somewhere between your chin and shoulders? With bangs? You are, without knowing it, imitating a haircut given to model Karlie Kloss several months ago. Kloss, whose hair is bafflingly described in the Styles piece as "dark," is "already a fashion world veteran at age 20," whereas you are nothing of the kind. Maybe your hair has been in this style on and off since you can remember, the main obstacle being that hair grows and however chic this looks, it requires getting haircuts more often than twice a year. Never mind that - you are imitating Ms. Kloss, on account of she's a famous model and you're not. Even if you've been rocking "The Karlie" since before Karlie was born.

But do not despair! You can likely rest assured that your hairdresser isn't about to be quoted in the Style section, period, which means he won't be saying of you, “'I gave her a personality by cutting it.'”